Friday 27 February 2009

Stargate (1994)

[Movie 94 / Day 58]


Whilst excavating a site in Egypt in the 1920s, a strange circle covered in symbols is discovered. Fast forward many years and scientists are still trying to work out what the symbols mean. Until the old lady in charge of the project recruits Dr Daniel Jackson (James Spader), who is laughed at in his lectures because of his wacky theories.

Within a few days, Jackson has worked out the meaning of all the symbols and discovered that the big circle thing is a gate to another dimension.

Obviously, the sensible thing to do is to send a bunch of hard-nosed soldiers through, led by Colonel Jack O'Neil (Kurt Russell, sporting the flattest flat top I've ever seen).

On the other side, we discover that the Egyptians were enslaved by Ra, a being that they thought was a god but turns out is an alien that was trying to find a way to live for ever.

Give it a few hours and our team of intrepid explorers has discovered a civilisation, thanks largely to a big hairy animal that looks like it has a face full of Botox. A couple of hours after that, clever Dr Jackson is conversing with them (despite declaring that they speak a language that has been 'dead' for over 1000 years). The next day, Ra rocks up, all angry that someone has dared open his precious gate up again. He comes sporting a terrific pyramid shaped space ship and some fancy guards, complete with mighty morphin' head pieces and laser guns - not to mention his personal collection of freaky kids.

Whilst Colonel Jack is looking all moody and teaching kids not to play with guns (strangely, he actively encourages them to smoke, however), that sly old dog Doc Jackson has gone and got married.

Unfortunately, they can't return to Earth because there's a symbol missing from the 2nd stargate. Thanks to an amazing stroke of luck however, Dr Jackson discovers the missing symbol - when one of the young lads draws it on a cave wall, despite us being told that they Ra banned them from learning to read or write.

Obviously, the badass Colonel attacks the flying pyramid. And gets captured. But it's OK, because the plucky kids have found the special forces secret stash of weaponry and within minutes are fully tooled up like a gang of dreadlocked mini-Rambos.

A few scuffles ensue, during which Ra's eyes have a habit of glowing white, before the good guys win by beaming a nuke on board Ra's spaceship when he does a runner.

Roland Emerich directed it and a couple of years later did the big budget Will Smith sci-fi actioner Independance Day. It seems like he reused bits of the Stargate score, as they seem very similar in places.

Anyway, it's ridiculous and makes for an average sci-fi actioner.

My rating: 6.0 / 10
IMDB rating: 6.7 / 10
Running time: 121 mins
IMDB link

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